This is Part 2 of a two part series on my recent experiences with the Twitter Right Think Mob.
Hunter Drew, the face and head of an organization I am a proud member of, the Fraternity of Excellence, has always been there for me. When I was a nobody on Twitter, he promoted my posts, my vision, and was there to help me. So, in return, I joined his organization hoping to find a tribe of men that I could be a part of.
I wouldn’t be disappointed.
What I found was a great group of men, committed to each other and their causes, focused on finding purpose, supportive of each other during times of good and bad news. I found men who encouraged each other, held each other accountable for their actions, and had fantastic discussions about all sorts of topics, from life with kids to jobs to personal loss.
Hunter had it all set up. Support pages, introductions, meetups, blogs, everything a man could use to communicate with other men about problems and successes he was having every day. He even had fitness stuff!
I’ve yet to do Hunter’s program “31 Days to Masculinity“, but I’m excited to get started on it. But this all leads me to believe one thing.
Every man needs a tribe.
So what the hell does this have to do with this blog post? Well, as a matter of fact, quite a bit.
Hunter tweets regularly, and like myself, proudly shares his life on Twitter. He posts some amazing stuff, and like me, also posts stuff that he believes that could be construed as unpopular. And like me, he got a bit of shit from posting this tweet earlier this week:
The biggest problem with this that women had? The dresses.
That this tweet was taken as misogynistic shows how little particular women, especially feminists, take themselves seriously. There is nothing offensive about this, just a man spelling out a list of things he’d recommend to current and future moms.
Thousands of screaming women descended upon Hunter’s feed like ticks on a monkey. They routinely accused him of “telling them what to do”. Some examples of his detractors:
The Problem with Outrage
When the outrage mob came for Hunter, they did the same thing that they did to me. His tweet was innocuous enough, but how it was taken by the Folks Offended by Everything™ was the issue here. They don’t deal in subtlety. Everything that is posted can be taken as a perceived slight.
Hunter was simply pushing his opinion about how to be a better mother, and it was met with women questioning how he had any authority to tell women anything.
Here’s the thing, outrage mob, he didn’t. You ascended him into that position by replying to his tweet, which you didn’t have to do either.
The mob feels like they are constantly on alert for bullies, those who think differently than them. And the ultimate prize? The slam of said bully.
Social justice is on display real-time on Twitter. Victimhood charlatans are out on the prowl for any perceived racist, sexist, homophobic, or even fatphobic (their word, not mine) threat, looking to slam the bully in full view of the eyes of millions, to show that no virtue is below defending, as long as we show what is “wrong” and what is “right”.
With replies like the above, completely devoid of any context, just yelling at Hunter because he had to audacity to put out an unpopular, yet valid, opinion, women who reacted once again showed why they only get taken seriously when they threaten to silence their detractors. Instead of debating Hunter on the semantics of his statement, they decidedly marketed it as wrong think and placed it in the box of shame for all others.
These women act as the arbiters of truth, even though they are merely the peddlers of outrage.
The minute they got offended was the minute they let Hunter have authority. Instead of respectfully disagreeing with this opinion, they decided to burn the witch, they weren’t having it. Why? Nothing in his post even came close to misogyny. He believes, as do I, that women embracing their femininity is good for everything in the long run.
But women with a grand distaste for men, especially feminists, would rather die than be beholden to men. And that’s what so funny. Men aren’t even coming close to asking them or making them do anything. They’ve earned their rights, and no one is interested in taking those away. But we can still pine for a day when women again use their femininity in concert with men, and stop fighting the idea that men and women can get along, not one being submissive to the other.
But that’s never what modern feminism was about. It was never about equality. It was about revenge. Revenge for our past as men, where women were treated as second class citizens. We had nothing to do with it, but we sure have to pay for it.
The Big Deal
So what about Hunter’s tweet pissed off so many women?
The dresses? Really? Women wearing dresses is nothing new, but Hunter never said women couldn’t wear what they wanted, just that if they want to be better mothers, they should try to be more feminine.
Look, women can wear whatever the hell they want. Anyone can.
But what Hunter is saying is a larger problem permeating the now fempowerment culture. Women refuse to play to their strengths, instead trying to be like men. Many women feel that acting like women means they have to be subservient to men. That is the furthest thing from the truth.
Many women will go out of their way to avoid doing anything to please men. Because actually pleasing men is frowned upon.
Why? Because many feminists believe that pleasing men is beneath them. They feel like they are going back in time when women were subservient to men, when in fact, it’s just a gesture of personal gratification. Men are encouraged to please women, but they caveat is for them to be subservient to women because “women have done it long enough and it’s time for men to do it.”
Feminism has never been about equality, it’s about revenge.
The time for hating men is upon us. Modern men, who had nothing to do with past oppression against women and have actually pushed reforms to make equality a reality, are now the enemy, because simply being a man is now toxic. Manspreading, mansplaining, etc, have all become buzz words for feminism’s war on men, and it’s getting worse the further into the 21st century we get.
What’s wrong with a person who believes in the traditional sense of the roles men and women play. Both genders need to play to their strengths, as well as limit trying to do what the other has agency over.
In short, men are better at being men, women are better at being women, both bring things to the table and complement each other.
And we’ve lost that.
- Be Feminine
There’s nothing wrong in the least with being feminine, especially as a mom. Many feminists see being feminine as submitting to men, and this is the furthest thing from the truth. Femininity is a powerful, and it can wield quite the power over a man, which in and of itself is a superpower. Femininity has built empires.
- Wear Dresses
There is nothing wrong with wearing dresses. It accentuates a woman’s feminine qualities and is beautiful to boot (especially if she has the body for it.).
- Don’t hit your kids
This one goes without saying, JFC. Don’t ever hit your kids, men or women.
- Enforce boundaries
Many single mom households are boundaryless, hence we are seeing more issues with kids not being told “no”. This also goes for marriages when both parents don’t enforce boundaries. Kids need boundaries, or they will become unruly and disrespectful.
- Be Physically active
Why not? In my epic struggle with ham planetness, men and women need to be more physically active, not only to show their kids a healthy lifestyle, but also to engage in fun, exciting, sexual activity with their significant other.
- Don’t Tease Your Kids
As we know, kids don’t do well with teasing. Try to limit this as much as you can and maintain your composure as the adult. Tease too much and kids will dismiss you when you attempt to discipline.
- Cook your family’s meals
Absolutely nothing wrong with caring for your family by cooking their meals. When “cooking” and “cleaning” come up, those are buzz words for feminism to attack. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman caring for her family by doing chores, especially if she wants to.
- Don’t Call Your Children Names
This goes with the teasing. Children are just that, children. They may not understand what you mean, have a short attention span, and get upset when then don’t think something is right or “fair”. Don’t exacerbate the situation by acting like a child yourself back to them. This does nothing but escalate their behavior.
- Don’t Get Drunk In Front of Them
Once again, this should go without saying. I never get drunk, but especially not in front of my kids. Be an example for them, and don’t let yourself lose control, regardless of the occasion or difficulties you’ve faced.
- Do Cheer Your Kids On
Show you care. A parent who cares about their kids and their well being will be at every event they can catch, especially sports. Cheer them on regardless of win or lose. Show effort in them, and they’ll return that effort for you.
So what’s wrong with this list? None of these are particularly offensive, yet many women called this list “misogynist”.
Hint? It isn’t. It’s feminists fighting with the idea of a man having an idea about what they should be or how they should act. It’s a power play to deflect a perfectly reasonable list away from the fact that this is man telling women “how to act”.
It’s recommendations and an opinion.
Men are allowed to have those, for now.